Saturday, September 11, 2010

Saved (Poem by Yours Truly)

I'm saving my anger because I know it's not worth the pain
I'm saving the Word in my heart for a day when I know it'll rain
I'm saving my virginity for my husband, when he is true
I'm saving all the drama for with it, I won't make it through
I'm saving myself from all the heartaches that I know will come with corrupt friendships
I'm saving my heart for the man I love. Won't give it away in petty relationships
I'm saving all the actions-without-though and, instead, following the paths that God has paved
Because once Christ came into my heart everything was saved.

Thursday, September 9, 2010

Broken Promises, Broken Up, Broken Hearted

So... Ahmad and I broke up... I can't say that I've ever cried after ANY breakup before EVER.... Until now..
I guess I just need to let it go for now.. It's so hard, though. I just knew we'd be together for a long time, if not forever.. But I guess that was just one of my teenage fantasies.. Maybe one day in the future we'll be something again...
That's something that I would like to pray for but, since we just broke up last night, I think I should just pray for healing right now..
We were great friends before we got together though.. He's hilarious.. But I can't say that I don't have any hard feelings toward him. I have a TON of hard feelings just because that's my personality..
After a relationship, usually my first emotion is anger.. But not always.. I think just because it's him and I put a lot into that relationship...
So what did we learn?
Save your heart for someone who deserves it. I'm not giving my heart out to anyone else unless they decide to give me theirs, too! Then maybe I won't hurt so much after my next breakup..
Haha.. "Teenage Love Affair" by Alicia Keys comes to mind... Because I think this is the deepest I've ever been with anyone..
And after typing all this, I don't think I have as many hard feelings as before... :)

Monday, September 6, 2010

THIS Mad.....

YOU make me THIS MAD!!! You make me so mad I can't even think straight... I can't stop thinking about how MAD you freakin make me!!
I just don't understand how you can be such a butthead.... I just can't stand you anymore.... And I want to scream and cry like the image above because of how upset I am at you..
I guess I just let my heart go too soon... I guess I let my guards down for you when I always promised to never do such a thing... And it really upsets me that you're hurting me and you don't even know it..